Nomological Net

Stray thoughts from here and there. The occasional concern for construct validity. No more logic. Fish.

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faults in the clouds of delusion

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Pure as the huh?

Driven snow is not pure. It's violated. It has been pushed aside from where it lay, lifted up in a shovelful, and dumped in a heap on the side of the path. I know, because I did it myself. Twice today, for a total of forty minutes, plus I watched the lady across the street doing it herself. By the time snow is driven, it's old, wasted, used, scattered, and utterly unromantic.

There is nothing pure about driving snow either. You have to bend, you have to be crooked, you have to run the sidewalk with your weight on your shovel, you have to cause yourself pain in your sides and your palms, and you have to do it repeatedly. It is annoying and it is unproductive.

Fallen snow only looks pure. It is not. It carries the deceptive facade of shimmering innocence but it is evil. It clogs sidewalks and driveways, creeps into cracks in windows, and ices up your windshield wipers causing you to risk scratching. It wisps its way under your overcoat and through its buttons and settles on your carefully wrought outfit causing patches that reveal their dampness only after you are far, far away.

Who makes these dumb metaphors up, anyway?

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i guess, people who don't have to shovel that snow off the sidewalk..

1/23/2008 5:32 PM  
Blogger ??! said...

Mr. Hallmark, and his friend, Mr. Archie.

While sitting in a fire-lit study, drinking large snifters of cognac, and eating hot waffles with honey.

The bastards!

1/23/2008 6:05 PM  
Blogger km said...

Ha ha ha...You poor Motown dwellers.

Who makes these dumb metaphors up, anyway?

Um..that would be Shakespeare. I bet that bastard never shoveled an ounce of snow in his life. "Anne, there's snow outside the house and I am busy writing King Lear!"

1/23/2008 11:09 PM  
Blogger Tabula Rasa said...

anonymous:
yeah, armchair theorists.

??!:
how the media manipulates us - innit?

km:
if i was a real motown dweller i'd be blasting it all while tearing down the sidewalk on my motorized snow-plow.

do you think shakespeare's also to blame for "don't taste the yellow snow?"

1/24/2008 12:27 AM  
Blogger Lekhni said...

Driven snow is pure - if it has been driven by the wind. We humans defile everything we touch :(

1/26/2008 11:10 PM  
Blogger Tabula Rasa said...

point well taken; unless that snow's been driven onto my car.

1/30/2008 8:47 PM  
Blogger Salil said...

Agree. But I'd also add that once it starts melting with some salt or sun, it'll create a horrendous mess on the pavements/streets and make gardens look like disaster zones. Snow is evil.

1/31/2008 7:42 AM  
Blogger Tabula Rasa said...

yes, that too.

1/31/2008 9:26 AM  
Anonymous anasuya said...

As Lekhni says, driven by forces more natural than Mr Model-T, silly.

...I see you've been tagged by BlackMamba and are making rude noises about me as usual? grr.

And dammit, you're beating me at Scrabulous as usual (despite hiccups)!

2/01/2008 3:05 AM  
Blogger Tabula Rasa said...

anasuya:
a) the wind could drive it onto my model t, no? doesn't make me like it any the more.

b) you don't like the usual?

c) the hiccups being you taking a week to make a move. why do you think they invented revenge matches?

2/01/2008 11:24 PM  

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